xanthan gum

Suggestion -- and I [s]your bleeding October girl[/s], the blueprint to your doomsday master plan. It breaks the three line set up, but you don't really need reminding in a ...

I would redo the linebreaks here. These are my suggestions: The wavelets of the lake pat against your ankles,[s] like [/s]a wagging , soggy dog ready to shake and ecstatic ...

to the signs of "leave." This latter part of the image isn't nearly as beautiful as the rest of it. It's nice, but it pales in comparison. "signs of leave"? ...

And my skin is scrawled with sooty black ink And sooty black ink runs through my veins. Lots of "and"s to start off lines makes it seems sort of like ...

Line by line thoughts: You’re hiding in my finger-folds. I see this more as the representative of the spaces between one's fingers. Either a lover or a partner or a ...

:) Amusing, and I liked how it showed the tie in to the backward haunting thoughts of your mind. I wish there weren't so many capitals, but the format make ...

shhhh... This seems so informal compared to the rest of the poem. I'd suggest something along the lines of "shush" or just "shh" (two h's) if you want to keep ...

I love your poetry, Cameron, but the beginning of your work is always vague and somewhat whimsical, like this is an unplanned tangent. It isn't, of course, and comes together ...

I loved the use of style here, how the reader is so immersed in the pure atmosphere, which is entirely realistic, that they do not release the emotions they are ...

To make any poem worthwhile, the less extra words, the better. To make a short poem worthwhile, what is said in the short amount of space must have gravity far ...

The beginning dragged me in. It was interesting, full of images, beautifully tying into each other. And then this system was just repeated and dragged out through the rest of ...

I applied for a new passport today. Took my photo at the booth. Snap. Poker face. This abrupt beginning, which suits the feeling of "snap. poker face" continues throughout the ...

This is beautiful and fluent, it flows off the tongue. You've created poetry of the recitation of imagery, which is an artform of itself. It'd like to see more of ...

I didn't believe my parents when they told me about monsters not existing under the bed That may very well be a double negative, or I may just be wrong. ...

Wonderful. And I'd like to commemorate you on your use of sentence structure to add dramatics. For example: Night >> sinking (simile) august >> looms (simile) guilt >> definite prophecies ...